


More Than Sexual Combustibility.

by Lanna Michaels (lannamichaels)



Category: 1776 (1972)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Crack, Alternate Universe - Fans & Fandom, Alternate Universe - Modern, Because #yuletide, Continental Congress, Fandom Stocking - 2013, John Adams Is The Worst Mod Ever, Pinch Hits, Sit Down John
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-05
Updated: 2014-01-05
Packaged: 2018-01-07 14:09:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1120792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lannamichaels/pseuds/Lanna%20Michaels
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A second flood, a simple famine, plagues of locusts everywhere, or a cataclysmic earthquake, I'd accept with some despair. But, no, you sent us fandom. Good God, sir, was that fair?</p>
            </blockquote>





	More Than Sexual Combustibility.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Missy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missy/gifts).



> For [bring_me_sugar/Missy's fandom stocking!](http://fandom-stocking.dreamwidth.org/392657.html) This started off as being [based on this tumblr post](http://lannamichaels.tumblr.com/post/72269774698/strawberry-fox-live-love-laurens), but then I started talking about it in #yuletide and it turned into But Mr Adams instead. ;)

**adams:** LISTEN UP MOTHERFUCKERS WHO IS GOING TO WRITE THIS FIC FOR ME?

 **adams:** USER NAME: HANCOCK

 **adams:** WANTS: PERSUASIVE RHETORIC

 **adams:** JEFFERSON, YOU'RE ON DECK. YOUR RHETORIC IS FUCKING FABULOUS. 

**jefferson:** nope. Can't make me.

 **jefferson:** I have to beta my wife's big bang fic. There's a lot of banging to do! Bigly! Did I mention banging? I'm passing on this one, make puppy dog eyes at someone else.

 **adams:** Oh come on. Exhibit A: _On the Necessity of Taking Up Arms_. Magnificent! Why, you write ten times better than anyone in this fest. (Including me.) Now then, will you be a pinch hitter, or a beta?

 **jefferson:** A beta.

 **adams:** Disgusting. Who else is on? Franklin!

 **franklin:** How about you? You daylight as a lawyer, surely there must be some legal mind and brilliance in there somewhere. Give Hancock his moving persuasive rhetoric boner.

 **adams:** I can't write the requested characters. They're too obnoxious and dislikeable, you know that.

 **franklin:** yeah, that's true.

 **adams:** Well?

 **franklin:** Moderator Adams, but Moderator Adams, the things I write are only light fluff. I won't fic anything serious, it's too tough. 

**adams:** Franklin, I don't have time to sit here listening to you quote yourself.

 **franklin:** :( that was a new one.

 **adams:** BNFs, good god.

 **adams:** All right. Sherman! You should write it. You are never controversial or on fandom_wank. Et cetera et cetera.

 **sherman:** LOL NO. I don't know a participle from a predicate. I'm just a simple fanartist from Florida.

 **adams:** Bah. Livingston! You have friends, right? You're pretty diplomatic. Take this pinch hit. I can't.

 **livingston:** I'm literally in the delivery room right now. Count me out.

 **adams:** coughjeffersoncough

 **jefferson:** C'MON ADAMS, LEAVE ME ALONE.

 **adams:** *just looks at you*

 **jefferson:** Adams, come on, I'm sure you wouldn't know how it is, but for some of us, we're betaing big bang fics. They're very long and hard and often need a lot of direct, focused attention. 

**jefferson:** Hands-on attention. 

**jefferson:** Like that. 

**jefferson:** Exactly like that.

 **franklin:** +1

 **jefferson:** see, Franklin knows how it is. 

**adams:** Do it anyway.

 **jefferson:** BUT I BETA, MODERATOR A.

 **adams:** SO DO I, JEFFERSON. Cry me a river.

 **jefferson:** You do? o.O

 **franklin:** o.O

 **sherman:** o.O o.O

 **adams:** UGH ALL OF YOU. Don't make me have to get Lee to do this. Don't do that to me. Please.

 **franklin:** You know you love us.

 **franklin:** Not like that? Perhaps like that? Maybe you could be convinced?

 **adams:** Franklin, this may come as a surprise, but life is more than sexual combustibility.

 **franklin:** Lies.

 **adams:** SO MUCH UGH.

 **jefferson:** you totes deserve it.

 **adams:** So you'll write it, Jefferson?

 **jefferson:** Who will make me?

 **adams:** I.

 **jefferson:** You?

 **adams:** Yes.

 **jefferson:** How?

 **adams:** By blatant bribery if necessary. It's your duty, dammit, your duty to the fest.

 **jefferson:** Damn you.

 **jefferson:** Once again, you stand between me and my lovely bride.

 **franklin:** ooooooh.

 **adams:** FRANKLIN.

 **jefferson:** Adams, you are driving me to homicide.

 **adams:** So long as you hit minimum word count, I don't care which character you kill off!

 **jefferson:** Who said I was talking about the characters?

 **adams:** ...Oh. Well, so long as you write it.

 **adams:** But I can't make you. The decision is yours. Do as you liked with it.

 **jefferson:** ...

 **jefferson:** You bastard.

 **jefferson:** Fine, I'll do it.

 **adams:** YAY! 

**adams:** Next pinch hits in three hours, okay with the rest of you?

 **franklin:** Sure thing. That reminds me, did I ever tell you how much you remind me of my old high school principal?

 **sherman:** This is the strangest pinch hitters list I have ever been on.

 **adams:** Don't knock it if it works.


End file.
